Starting a New Job Is Hard: Here’s How to Navigate the Challenge
Starting a new job is often hard, even when it’s the right move. You can feel prepared and excited about accepting the position but still find yourself facing discomfort or anxiety about the change. That isn’t a sign that something’s wrong with you or your decision; it’s a normal part of the transition.
Here is some information about what can actually help, drawn from our years of experience placing candidates in new roles, and invaluable insights provided by our partner Chantel Butt, Founder & CEO of Covalency Coaching & Consulting.
We Underestimate How Hard Starting a New Job Is
Everyone in the workforce has been the new person at a job at some point in their career, but not everyone talks about how challenging that can be. As Chantel Butt points out, the most difficult time is usually the first 3–6 months, and for very good reasons:
- The new position often isn’t the only change you’re going through. Starting a new job is usually paired with other life changes:
- Departing from a job where you were unhappy or stressed and may be still navigating strong emotions or burnout
- Leaving a job where you may have been happy, and grieving that loss
- Exiting high school or postsecondary education
- Moving to a new city or country
- Going through other changes in your personal life
- Changing jobs often comes with uncertainty and a sense of losing some control. Regardless of how much you liked or disliked your previous role, it likely had familiarity and comfort in knowing how things worked. When you join a new company, that resets.
- You’re not just learning new tasks, systems, and jargon, you’re also navigating new relationships, and that can be a heavy mental lift. Not only do you have to learn names and faces, but it takes time to understand how the interpersonal dynamics work, what unwritten norms exist, and how colleagues relate to each other.
As pointed out by Sherri Walker, it doesn’t matter whether you generally love or hate change, the transition to a new job is hard, so give yourself some grace during this time.
Don’t Give Up on a New Job Too Quickly
Even if we can accept that it’s normal and even common to have strong feelings in a new job, undoubtedly we all still want to know what we can do to improve the situation.
To start, Chantel Butt advises that:
“The most important thing to remember is having complicated feelings in a new job is completely normal, and usually not a sign that you made the wrong choice.”
Do people occasionally make the wrong call about a new job? Of course. It’s a major decision with many factors to weigh, and sometimes despite our due diligence, we end up in a role or organization that isn’t quite the right fit. However, if you rush to give up on a new job during this tenuous time, before working through discomfort and general ‘newness,’ you might miss out on a fantastic opportunity.
As Indeed points out, “It’s normal to feel overwhelmed when starting a new job. There are new policies, processes, tasks, and technology to learn about, so it’s important that you give yourself time to adapt to your new environment. You may just need a few extra weeks to settle into the job before you start finding it easier.”
Discomfort Is a Signal to Get Curious
There’s a lot of talk about “imposter syndrome” in the workplace—a feeling of persistent doubt concerning one’s abilities or accomplishments, and the fear of being exposed as a ‘fraud.’ Regardless of if we experience literal imposter syndrome, most of us can relate to feeling doubt about our skills or decisions.
Chantel Butt points us towards the work of Adam Grant, an organizational psychologist, professor, and author, who says:
“Impostor syndrome is not a clue that you’re unqualified. It’s a sign of hidden potential. When you think others are overestimating you, it’s more likely that you’re underestimating yourself. Others have an outside view. They can see capacity for growth that’s not yet visible to you.”
So if we’re doubting our abilities, it’s a signal focus on growth, rather than what we think we’re lacking.
Building on this, Chantel talks about how negative self-talk such as “I’m bad at this” or “I don’t belong here” is unproductive, and even can create neural pathways that we want to avoid. She coaches new employees to reframe these thoughts as “there’s something to learn here, what is it?” or “I feel like I don’t belong here, where is that coming from?” Activating curiosity can be a powerful tool to shift your mindset.
Revisit Your Reasons
When doubt seeps in, Sherri Walker suggests reminding yourself why you applied for and accepted this job, and come back often to those reasons. If the company’s values resonate with you, that can be particularly powerful and keep you going through the most difficult days.
If you’re struggling to bring those reasons to mind, reach out to someone you would have spoken to during your job search. A trusted confidant can help remind you what you were seeking in your job search and why you were excited about this new opportunity.
Building Confidence & Relationships
Regaining a feeling of control and competence is a pathway to alleviating new job discomfort. Chantel shares three areas of focus:
- Getting clear on expectations
- Learning new tasks
- Building relationships
Getting Clear on Expectations
The uncertainty of not knowing what’s expected of you can be a difficult part of the job transition. Work with your manager to ensure expectations are clear for what success looks like at three months, six months, nine months, and a year. Once those expectations are clear, you can break them down into tangible steps and tasks, which will help you regain control and confidence.
Learning New Tasks
Mastering new tasks is key to feeling competent in your new role, and that will come with time and training. If you feel there are gaps in your onboarding or training, speak up and advocate for what you need to succeed.
Building Relationships
Learning the tasks of your job goes a long way, but building relationships is what will really propel your confidence. Here are Chantel’s tips to get started:
- Be proactive. Some relationships will grow organically over time, but intentional effort truly counts. Identify who your key colleagues are—within your team and across departments. As you get to know people, ask who else it will be valuable to meet. An org chart can be a handy resource!
- Be approachable. When colleagues see you being open and approachable, actively reaching out and attempting to build relationships, they’re likely to reciprocate.
- Be curious. We all want to show that we’re capable, resourceful, and can figure things out. But especially when you’re new, there’s value in asking questions and being vulnerable. When you’re open to saying “I need help” or “I don’t know this yet” rather than faking it, it builds trust with your colleagues.
Adapting to Your New Workplace
As you settle in, you’ll likely want to bring your new ideas and fresh perspective to the team—and often this is exactly what your employer wants too! But Chantel cautions as a new hire, there are ways to do this tactfully, which are more likely to be well-received:
- Be confident in the fact that you were hired for a reason. The employer wants your skills and perspective, and there’s likely a gap in the team that you’re there to fill. However, don’t push for dramatic changes on day one. Instead, focus on asking questions, learning about the company’s history, and gaining an understanding of why things are the way they are. Write down your ideas and be strategic about when and how you bring them forward.
- Avoid phrases like “at my last company we…” as they tend to make people defensive. Try asking questions like “have you ever considered…?” or “has the company ever tried…?”
- Don’t fake something you don’t know, people will almost always see through that and lose trust. Do the things you do well with confidence, and ask questions about areas you’re unsure about.
Overall, contribute your ideas and fresh perspective, but with humility and respect for those who have come before you in the organization.
Practice Real Self Care
The expression “drinking from the fire hose” is often used to describe the experience of onboarding in a new job. You’re absorbing an incredible amount of information at a rapid pace, while meeting new people, navigating a new space, and getting used to a new routine. Make sure you’re taking care of yourself during this time:
- Ensure you get enough sleep – it’s crucial for retaining new information
- Protect your work-life balance – ensure you’re making time for your relationships, hobbies, and rest so you can show up as your best self
- Talk to you manager directly if you’re struggling
Don’t make any rash decisions until you’ve had a chance to settle in, and most importantly, be gentle on yourself as you work through this transition period.
A Final Note: If You Were Placed by a Recruiter
If you were placed in your new job by a recruitment agency such as The Headhunters or one of our partners within the Humanis Advisory Group, your recruiter can be a helpful resource if you’re finding the first weeks in your new job challenging. At The Headhunters, our Recruitment Consultants will be proactively in touch with you for the first few months of your new job, and they can be an experienced, confidential ear to listen if you need to talk through what you’re experiencing or any worries you may have.
For more coaching insights, follow Chantel Butt, Founder & CEO of Covalency Coaching & Consulting on LinkedIn.